Recently I made an important life decision. While I am at peace with the decision, I struggled with how to communicate it.
I went for a quick stroll. Being out in nature always helps me think. Okay, maybe always is too strong a word because this time it didn't help.
I binge watched an old season of one of my favorite television shows to clear my head. Does anyone else find watching strangers demolish houses and then renovate them relaxing? No? Ok, I guess it is just me! 😂
Still, I couldn't capture the words to describe my decision.
So, I searched for some inspirational podcasts. Maybe other women would have the right words. I listened to a few, but nothing resonated until I found one where one woman said to her friend, "You have earned the right to rest." And it hit me. Yes. That's it! The right to rest.
Like so many of you reading this, I've lived my entire professional life in service to others, and throughout my 30-year career I've been a workaholic. That last trait I inherited from my hardworking Italian-American family. I come from a long line of hard workers!
However, during the pandemic I had some much-needed time to pause, for the first time in my professional life, and while I was still working nonstop, I was in one place.
I was able to remain still.
In one spot.
Surrounded, albeit virtually, by the people most precious in my life.
I wasn't on the road four days per week. I could be outdoors more, which is very centering for me. I was able, if only virtually, to be present for joyous occasions, birthdays and holidays in a way that I couldn't be the last decade. Most importantly I had time with my husband to verbalize and envision our hopes and dreams. We had the gift of time to plan what we wanted the next phase of our lives to be.
As the state and nation started to emerge from the pandemic, my calendar started to fill up again.
I was getting request after request to be in the field.
I had to go back to figuring out when I was going to be able to see my family and friends, make basic appointments and keep up with my personal needs. Time outdoors began to dwindle. I even saw that I was going to be spending my 30th wedding anniversary* on the road for work. I realized in that moment, the drive that I once had to be everywhere and do everything for my job didn't feel the same way as it did prior to the pandemic. (*Side note: The NYSUT leaders I did spend my wedding anniversary with made my day extra special! 😊)
However, my work schedule felt like it was pulling me away from the people and places that bring me joy. Just thinking about all the work travel and time away made me want to lie down and take a nap with the covers over my head. I thought to myself, "It may be time to pivot."
I took many lessons with me as we emerged from the pandemic. One major lesson was about sustaining real relationships with my loved ones and staying connected to the people in my life that will be here once this work is done. Another was about being more present. A third focused on carving out more time to be in nature.
That bubble of people we cultivated during the pandemic? Those were the people, and the many life experiences with them, that I craved more of in my life.
My decision was made. I've earned the right to rest.
To that end, I will not be seeking re-election as NYSUT's Executive Vice President. After 30+ years in education and union life, I need to be in control of my own time and pivot onto a new path.
The good news is I still have months ahead of me to keep doing the work NYSUT members, like you, have entrusted me to do. I will keep fighting for you in every way that I can at the state level, and I know NYSUT will remain as strong as ever because it is the "you" in NYSUT that has always mattered— the local presidents and members who are on the frontlines each day doing the work to serve New York's students and patients. It is you who leads and fights for what is right in your communities. People like me are just the lucky ones who get to represent you, but it is you who's the real backbone of this union.
This journey has been humbling, and I remain so honored to have earned your trust. It has been a privilege representing you as NYSUT's Executive Vice President.
My wish for all of you?
That one day you too realize when you've earned the right to rest and give yourself the space to do that without regret or apology.
Until I see you again in person...stay well and most importantly stay true to yourself.
